I can barely see to type right now I can't stop crying. My heart is broken wide open and my home is empty. This morning when Dave woke Snitch up she was sitting in the bottom of her cage. He woke me up and I came downstairs and she was fluffed up sleeping head under her wing in the bottom. I talked to her and she wasn't reacting. I immediately called the vet. Vet is closed so I called the emergency clinic. They only do cats and dogs but gave me a number for a place in Guelph (about an hour drive) which I called and made an appointment for 3:10pm. I walked back over to the cage and opened it and picked her up and she didn't even flinch or fight. I knew at that moment it was bad and begged her to hang on until we got to the vet. I put her in her carrier case and we left immediately and called the vet back to let them know we were on our way. She stayed upright but nestled down all the way there until we pulled into the parking lot and then she fell over on her side. I ran in with her and handed her off to the nurse who took her back to give her oxygen. The vet was there and said she tried to resuscitate her but was not able to. She said she examined her fully and could not see anything but a very healthy canary. They offered to do an autopsy but I couldn't see a point - knowing what it was (if it was nothing that even the vet could diagnose from looking at her) is not going to bring her back, only defile her body. We brought her home, put her favourite toy in the box with her and have put her in the freezer in the basement so we can bury her under my peony in the spring when the ground thaws.

I never imagined when I first saw her that I could grow to love her so completely or that I would be this destroyed by her loss. It's too soon, she was still young, and we should have had so many more road trips and cottage summers and afternoons playing and flying around my bedroom to spend together. I miss her so much already and I don't know how my heart will ever heal.

I can't even bring myself to tell anyone but you guys because I know you all know what i am going through and can understand how I feel.

RIP Snitch, you were the most loved and lovely canary I could possibly wish for. My heart will break every time I walk into the house and you are not here to greet me with "Hi Baby Bird!"